The Joy of Being Chosen

Sometimes I miss things when I am reading my Bible.  I can’t absorb it all in one shot.  It’s an inherent human trait.  We overload, and only a few of the things we deem most important actually stick in our minds.  I think it’s that way with the story of Christ’s birth.  We read Luke 2 and think the story starts and stops there. We remember the virgin mother, the lack of vacancy, the stable, the manger, the star, the angels, and the shepherds. What we miss is the fantastic example of joyous faith shown by Mary in Luke 1.

            In a surreal experience, Mary converses with the angel Gabriel who tells her that she is favored by God and chosen to be the mother of the Christ child.  Her child will “save his people from their sins” (Matthew 1:21).  It’s an amazing honor.  It’s a terrifying thought. She’s unmarried.  A pregnancy will make her a social outcast.  Yet, after what appears to be a very small amount of persuasive speaking by Gabriel, Mary says, “Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word.” (Luke 1:38 KJV)  And just like that, she throws her fears, her concerns, her hesitations on the Father and steps out into the great safety net of God.

            What fearless faith.  What selfless sacrifice.  What intense bravery.  She had no idea whether or not Joseph would marry her.  She couldn’t possibly comprehend what parenting the Christ child would entail.  There were no indications of how this would all play out.  She had only this assurance—God loved her, had found favor in her, had asked her to house his Son, and she had agreed. 

            This is where Mary and I meet up.  My life is full of uncertainty.  Sometimes I am overcome by fears, concerns, and problems. I am often overwhelmed.  I don’t have all the answers.  I have no idea how it’s all going to play out.  But I do know this—God loves me, he has found favor in me, he has asked me to carry his Son in my heart and exhibit him in my life, and I have agreed.  And in spite of all the things that attempt to chase me down and overcome my faith, I pray that I will step out into that same great safety net with Mary.  I pray that in the middle of the questions I will respond with her when she said, “…My soul doth magnify the Lord, and my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour.” (Luke 1:46-47 KJV)  God has chosen to dwell in me and that alone is cause for celebration. 

            It’s not just Mary and I who are so infinitely blessed to be chosen by God as his dwelling place.  Much like the story of his birth, he knocks on the door of every heart to inquire if there is a vacancy.  He knocks and offers to fill the void in our lives.  Upon admittance, he becomes the greatest friend, the wisest confidant, the strongest safe house.  Under our lives he places the great safety net of his grace and even if the storms rage, we know that he is greater than all and no one has the power to pluck us out of his hand. (John 10:29)

            So this Christmas, remember these facts—God loves you, he favors you, he wants you to allow him to dwell in your heart and exhibit him in your life.  It’s a more than fair trade, so I hope you accept.  I hope that you will fearlessly step out in faith to allow God to lead your life.  And when the circumstances are less than desirable, the outcome looks incredibly bleak, the storm seems impossible to calm, may you remember that, “…with God nothing shall be impossible” (Luke 1:37 KJV) and may you find yourself still faithfully stating with Mary, “My soul doth magnify the Lord…” (Luke 1:46)

The great God of the universe has chosen you.  This alone is cause for great celebration!

Merry Christmas!

I Wonder...

           Although Halloween is safely behind us for another year, I find myself still intrigued by the amount of coverage this event accrued on my social network news feed.  It happens every year. There are lengthy diatribes on why folks do not participate and lists of comments from individuals either assenting or dissenting.  The participants and non-participants lob pithy, condescending remarks at one another in an effort to prove their point.  No one earns a concession.  And I'm more than happy to leave that decision between you and God.   The barrage of coverage does, however, cause a lot of wondering on my part.

            Personally, I have no strong feeling one way or another concerning Halloween.  I think it is a silly, commercialized event that sparks a lot of conflict, but serves no real purpose on the calendar.  Any day can be deemed Christian or pagan, followers of any belief system can and do perform rituals or hold services whenever they want, children like to play dress up all through the year, and I find that I actually buy more individually wrapped candies throughout the year than I buy on Halloween.  Thus, I wonder why Halloween gets so much attention when holidays with much more value are coming up and will receive less or less appropriate coverage. 

            Thanksgiving is currently less than a month away.  Many are already planning their feasts, football games, and family time.  My news feed will then be full of photos depicting families, tables overflowing with food, and complaints of having eaten too much.  Some will express their gratitude for God, possessions, and family.  Then they will go on about their food, fun, and fellowship without a thought that there are two parts to the word “Thanksgiving”…thanks and giving.  I wonder if I’ll see any diatribes on giving to the needy during the month of November.  I wonder if, after reading Psalm 100, anyone will read I John 3:17 where it says that the love of God is not in that person who has this world’s goods yet turns a blind eye to someone in need.  I wonder.

            Christmas is less than two months away.  In truth, there is not a worse holiday for commercialism and material gluttony. Those who eschew Halloween often make up for it at Christmas.  Beautifully decorated Christmas trees are hidden by mounds of brightly wrapped packages loudly demonstrating extravagant excess.  I wonder if, when Luke 2 has been read (if it is at all) and the children are ready to dive into the gifts, someone will pause to remind them of the words of Jesus saying, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35 KJV)  I wonder.

            Lest you think that I am hypocritically throwing around opinions, blame or self appreciation, let me clear things up.  I know what it is to truly need. I have experienced the anxiety that comes with legitimately wondering if there will be enough money to get through the month.  I have had to rely on the charity of others.  God has never failed me.  He has always provided.  In return, we give back.  Every year at this time, we do a family project where we buy and donate food to a charity or food bank, or buy items to make blessing bags for the homeless. We donate to food drives as often as possible and this year we donated jackets to my daughter’s school for children who didn’t have them.  Sometimes it isn’t financially convenient to make these donations.  We do it anyway.  And God keeps providing.

            I said all that, not to toot my own horn, but to say this…Don’t let Halloween be the most discussed holiday this year.  Don’t forget the “giving” part of Thanksgiving.  Don’t make people go hungry because you had to have a pile of “wants” under your Christmas tree.  If you have never experienced need, learn the difference between “want” and “need”.  Remember, that somewhere in your town, children are not eating turkey on Thanksgiving or opening piles of presents on Christmas.  As you pose for your Christmas photo, remember that there is a little girl a few blocks over that doesn’t have a Christmas dress, but is wearing too big jeans and a ratty shirt.  Acknowledge in your heart that a little boy somewhere is playing with sticks because he doesn’t have real toys.  These aren’t scenes from the past.  They are real.  They are true.  They are happening near you. I wonder if you've noticed.

            I wonder if you realize that you can help.  If every Christian would donate a couple bags of food, a turkey, a coat, a dress, a pair of shoes, a toy, or a book, we could alleviate some of the need.  If every Christian would follow I John 3:8 and “…not love in word, neither in tongue; but in deed and in truth,” (KJV) Thanksgiving and Christmas would be the most talked about holidays of the year.  If every Christian would only remember that to whom much is given, much will most assuredly be required…(Luke 12:48)…I wonder what would happen.

Becoming Mary

 

An astonishing realization hit me this morning.  I am a Martha.  You know her.  Lazarus’ and Mary’s sister.  Unlike Mary, she was too busy to sit at Jesus’ feet and listen. (Luke 10:38-42) I don’t think it was that she didn’t want to listen. She just wanted to listen as she went about her zillion tasks.  She was so busy making sure everything was done according to her schedule that she was missing out on an important opportunity. She was missing out on simply sitting with Jesus, enjoying his presence, listening to his lessons, and drawing strength for the many tasks of the day.

Yep, I’m a Martha!  I often plan the future day (sometimes days) before the current one is expired.  I set goals and schedules and work crazily to get them accomplished.  I am frequently frustrated when things don’t go as planned and goals get off schedule. I feel less than useful when some tasks go undone or have to be pushed off to the next day…or week…or month…or get forgotten all together. The problem with my frenetic pace is that I do a lot of praying on the run, while baking bread, folding laundry, or driving to the grocery store.  I leave myself a very narrow window of time for private personal prayer, Bible reading, and reflection. 

Please do not misunderstand.  Prayer is prayer, no matter where or when you do it.  The Bible says, “Pray without ceasing.” (I Thessalonians 5:17) So, praying while doing your tasks is a great idea.  Likewise, any time you read your Bible, even just one verse, God has the opportunity to impress His words in your heart and teach you something.  So, even if you only have three minutes, be sure to read that one verse.  The point is this, when we hurry and cut short our personal time with God, we miss out on an amazing opportunity—enjoying God’s presence, listening to his lessons, drawing strength for our day.  Jesus summed it up like this, “…Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful…” (Luke 10:41-42 KJV) We desperately need his presence in our lives, his lessons guiding us, and his strength to endure life’s obstacles.  Time with Jesus is what is needful.

So today I am learning to become a Mary.  God asked me what was more important, the tasks or him…I chose him.  The laundry waited, the cleaning waited, the baking waited.  And I had the most phenomenal devotions because I waited before God for his presence to descend.  And it did.  I read things in the book of James that inspired me and bolstered my faith.  The Devil is pretty busy right now trying to disrupt all this, but I’ll just keep obeying James 4:7 and resist him because today I know these things with startling clarity: God loves me more than I can fathom and I love him back more than anything else.  Jesus is not just a guest in my home or life, but a permanent resident who goes with me throughout my day.  When I am weak, discouraged, or forgot that whole “Resist the Devil” concept, God’s got my back.  I am completely, wholeheartedly, unwaveringly God’s child.  Yes, today, I am a Mary.

I hope you didn’t see yourself as you read this.  I hope you are much better at managing your time and schedule than I am.  I hope you are already a Mary.  However, if you identify with Martha and me, there’s no time like the present.  Pull up a chair at his feet, or just crawl up in his lap and drink in the presence of Jesus.  Be blessed by his Spirit.  Learn or relearn a helpful lesson.  Soak in the strength he offers. And always, always remember that one thing is needful to keep your life on track…spending time with Jesus.

God’s Got This!

 

A few weeks ago, on Sunday morning, our pastor read II Chronicles 20.  God bless that man!  I hadn’t read Chronicles in quite some time, but as we read through the chapter the words of Jehoshaphat’s prayer in a time of unexpected trouble leapt off the page and indelibly inscribed themselves in the depths of my soul.  I know them.  I identify with them.  I could have penned them myself.  I pray them nearly every day.  He cried, “…neither know we what to do: but our eyes are upon thee.” (v. 12 KJV)

I am often clueless.  My children come to me with questions I can’t answer, problems I can’t immediately fix, fears I can’t easily assuage.  My mailbox spits out unexpected bills, my taxes come out five percent higher than I figured, and my doctor decides to run extra tests.  My friends and family need support that I may or may not be in a position to give. I am surrounded by things I can’t fix, change, or regulate.  My heart breaks. My worry queue grows.  I feel like I am losing the battle AND the war. 

And then I remember II Chronicles 20:12.  It is quickly becoming my lifeline.  I pray these words and the voices around me fade.  I find peace.  I trust God to take care of all these things.  I have proof that he will…ask Jehoshaphat and the Israelites. They weren’t facing a skirmish. They were facing a war. Not just one army steadily marched toward them, but several (v.1-2). They felt inadequate, ill-prepared.  They were clueless.  So they turned their eyes on God and discovered that the battle they were expecting wasn’t theirs to win or lose, but God’s (v.15).  All they had to do was keep their eyes on Him... And trust...And rest. They didn’t even have to fight. God had it all under control.

Chances are you identify with what’s written here.  Your soul is battered, your heart is scarred, your body exhausted with the constant barrage of things demanding your attention, your money, your time, your soul.  The truth is, you can’t fix everything.  You can’t help everyone.  You can’t make everything better.  You’ll lose yourself and your faith if you try.  I encourage you to turn to Jesus, let the voices around you fade, fasten your spiritual gaze unwaveringly on him, and genuinely pray, “I’m clueless on this, but my eyes are on you.” It doesn’t guarantee you’ll get your way.  It doesn’t assure you an instant miracle.  It doesn’t promise that you’ll understand the outcome. But it does mean you aren’t alone.  It means the resources aren’t tapped.  It means you can know peace-- peace springing from the knowledge that your faith resides with the God who refuses to let his people down.

I find courage in the fact that I am not the only one who is clueless.  I take refuge in the fact that turning my eyes on Jesus snaps my world into focus.  I find peace in the knowledge that I don’t have to know all the answers or outcomes because when I am clueless, confused, concerned, or cornered—God’s got this!  So, may we, like those who have gone before us, continually look “…unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith;” (Hebrews 12:2 KJV) May we remember that our faith is not misplaced.  Our peace is not ill-gotten. Our circumstances are not a surprise to God and he already has the answer.  May we learn to stand still, eyes trained on Jesus, allow him to fight our battles, and triumphantly embrace the fact-- God’s got this! 

Identity Crisis

As my children prepare to begin a new school year, I’ve been contemplating the expectations placed on school aged children.  Why do we expect the things we do?  Are our expectations realistic?  Mostly, are our expectations based on what is truly most important in life? I came to the realization that if my children retain nothing while in class, there is one thing I want them to know and know wholly before they leave my nest.  I want them to know who they are in God.  Not the person others perceive them to be, but who they truly are—children of God, beloved by God just the way he made them.

Scarily, my voice is not the only one they’ll hear.  At a young age society begins pounding on us, trying to force us to believe that who we are adds up to a diploma with honors, an Ivy League alma mater, a pile of designer clothes, a staggering bank account, a flashy car, a corner office, a magnificent mansion.  The whirlwind of society pushes our children to overwhelm themselves with myriad extra-curricular activities stacked on top of piles of homework all in a vain effort to define themselves as worthwhile and necessary.

 And it’s not just inside the public school system.  In every church (yes, even there), every school (public or private), every neighborhood (gated community or ghetto), the voices beckon.  The standards are set.  The “in” crowd is assembling.  The pressure is building.  And children are falling prey to the concept that simply identifying as a beloved child of God is not enough.

As adults we know the pressure doesn’t end with high school graduation, presentation of a college degree, or promotion to the corner office.  It only increases.  Enough already!  A degree is just a degree.  A job is just a job. Possessions are just things.  They offer nothing. No peace of mind.  No security.  No eternal reward.  When viewed as identifiers, they will lead one on an unhappy chase constantly seeking but never attaining that which will fill the void of undiscovered identity.  In light of this, each one must seek to know, understand, and fully believe what has been true since the dawn of time.

You are a child of God, painstakingly handmade in His image.  (Genesis 1:26-27) You were carefully crafted with your own personal set of idiosyncrasies, fortes and frustrations.  And that’s okay. God made no mistakes.  You are unique.  You are an amazing work of art by the Master Craftsman.  In God, you are complete. You are beautiful.  You are purposeful.  You are loved beyond measure.  You are treasured.  You are cherished.  You are beloved of God. God is your past, your present, your future…your roots, your branches, your fruit.  This, this is who you truly are—a handcrafted masterpiece created by the all powerful God who simply spoke and the world was.  You are a child of God. 

I am overwhelmed to think it.  It glitters more than those things I’m supposed to need to enhance my identity.  I’m humbled to think that God—as busy as he must be with all the garbage going on in the world—took the time to craft me so carefully.  I’m amazed and emotionally overcome every time I realize that I am beloved, cherished, treasured, and unconditionally loved by God.  In him I am fulfilled.  I need nothing more.  In God, I find my identity.

With that in mind, I pray that when my children finish high school (with honors or a GED), go to college (Ivy League, community, or trade school), and become working citizens (corner office or basement cubicle) that they will never place their perception of their worth on anything less or anything more than their true identity as God’s child.  For myself, I pray that I don’t get lost in a feeling of unimportant inadequacy and forget my identity.  For you, I pray that you see yourself in these words. That you don’t allow what you do for a living, have in the bank, or wear on your back to usurp your true identity. I pray that you will curl deep in your soul and find peace, contentment, happiness and hope in only one fact—you are a beloved, cherished, treasured child of God. Identify with that. 

Fat Souls

Have you ever found yourself begging God for something and not being certain you care whether or not it is his will?  I have.  In fact, I have recent experience.  Last month I found myself desperately begging God to give my family something I thought would be wonderful.  As I begged, it became harder and harder to ask that his will be done instead of wheedling my way to a “yes” response. Suddenly, in the midst of my struggling prayer, the words of Psalms 106:15 (KJV) came to me.  Referencing the Children of Israel on their journey through the desert after leaving Egypt, it reads, “And he gave them their request; but sent leanness into their soul.” And I stopped short.

Perhaps you remember the story in Numbers 11 where the Israelites, tired of living on manna, began to reminisce about the fish, melons, cucumbers, leeks, onions, and garlic of Egypt. (v. 5) They wept, railed, squalled and begged until God finally gave in and sent them quail…lots of quail…enough for a month of eating only that. (v.18-20, 31-32) It came at a price, for along with the quail came a great plague. (v.33) When they left that place, they left behind the burial place of those who had lusted after the things of Egypt to the point of pressing God to give them their way no matter the cost.  (v.34)

For me, the resemblance was too close. I saw myself treading that same path with but one difference--I desire nothing more than a fat soul.   I have no time for leanness brought on by selfish whims and earthly wishes. The flashy cars, electronic gadgets, huge homes, splashy parties, and exotic vacations of our world are not wrong, but can make our souls lean if they become our driving force. Earthly possessions, fame, and fortune can absolutely become our Egypt.  And an urgent, single-minded search for them will undisputedly bring leanness to our souls. 

I want no part of that leanness. I fear it.  My prayer has changed from begging God to match his will to mine and instead begging that he make my soul fat.  It isn’t always an easy decision.  It’s a choice I make daily. The truth is, I don’t need a bunch of earthly things to be happy or even content, but I refuse to live with a lean soul.  You see, all those fantastic things that make life easier, more fun, or appear to give us social status are grand, but they are unarguably not worth the peace of God. Sometimes, when I start to think maybe a lean soul wouldn’t be so bad if I had what I wanted, I consider what my soul would lose along with the fatness—peace, faith, satisfaction, friendship with Jesus.  Not worth it.  Nothing is.     

 I hope you feel the same way.  I hope that you urgently desire a fat soul.  In a world that is full of lights and bells and whistles all calling our name in a cacophony of alleged delight, may we recognize the danger of leanness, throw our fat souls at the foot of the cross and cry, “Just give me Jesus.”

Finding The Father

 

Have you ever noticed how difficult it is for many of us to view God as our Father?  I mean really see him as a loving Father figure. It takes no effort on our part to see him as ominous judge, disciplining warden, or stern overseer, but loving, humorous, friendly, forgiving…not so much.  Perhaps it’s because we have been so often reminded of the threat of punishment at his hand should we spurn him. Perhaps it’s something the Devil uses to make us shy away from God.  Perhaps it’s because we know ourselves and believe no one could love us in our current state.  I don’t know. I do know, however, that God is not some emotionless being far removed from us.  No, he pities us, hurts with us, comforts us, listens to us, leads us if we let him, and ultimately keeps hoping that if we choose to wander, we will come back home.

Does that seem impossible to you?  A God who loves like a father? Sometimes it does to me. I am hard on myself.  I hate my imperfections. Sometimes I feel alone, useless, wasted, unworthy. Thus, the parable in Luke 15 resonates deep within my soul…

Picture him, a middle aged, wealthy man with a wife, two sons, servants, livestock, and land.  His entire life has been poured into building an inheritance for his sons.  They are his pride and joy. He wants to hand something down to them that will enhance their future.  His boys work alongside him, learning to run the operation in a manner that reaps the most benefits.  From birth, they have been groomed for the time when all that their father has built will become theirs.  They are now grown and the father believes they love him and the family holdings enough to stay there and continue enhancing their inheritance until he passes away.

            But it is not to be.  The younger son becomes disillusioned with the work, the animals, the stench, the dirt, the country. He is bored.  The grass looks greener on the other side of the fence. He longs for a faster paced, less restricted life.  The stories of a far off country that seems so much more exciting and fun fill his head and give him ideas of fame and fortune.  They teem with easy wealth, bright lights, huge parties, and worldwide fame. Each day the son grows more and more discontented, more and more restless. Each day he despises his lot in life a little more. Finally, he goes to his father and asks for his inheritance so that he can build his own life far away from the things he hates. 

            The father is broken hearted, but complies because he realizes the need of each individual to find themselves in their own way. The son takes his inheritance and sets out for this alleged country of glamour.  He spends like the money is endless.  He lives like youth never fades.  He chases fame and fortune.  Sadly, he never finds them. The inheritance money runs out.  He finds himself destitute.  A famine takes over the land. In desperation, he hires on with a local farmer just to get by.  His job is feeding the pigs whatever scraps he decides not to eat himself. 

            One day, as he fights the pigs for his lunch, he realizes that he is worse off than when he started.  The animals, the stench, the dirt are back, but he is no longer in a position of favor.  He is unrecognizably filthy and unkempt.  He stinks. It dawns on him that he would be so much better off in his father’s house—if only as a servant.  In that moment he resolves to go to his father.  He gets up, brushes himself off the best he can, quits his job and heads toward home.  But not just toward home.  Toward his father. 

            He had a speech planned, a petition to become a servant.  He had no lofty goal of resuming his place as son.  Clearly, he has no doubt concerning the forgiveness of his father, as he appears quite certain of attaining the position of a servant. However, his lack of faith in being restored to the family suggests a wavering of his belief in the depth of his father’s love. Perhaps it was self loathing for what he had done and become that caused him to wonder if his father could love him with the same intensity. If he doubted his father’s love, he was in for a grand surprise. 

              His father was waiting for him.  Not just waiting, but watching.   He was anxiously sitting on the front porch, eyes trained on the road, straining for a glimpse of his wayward boy.  Imagine the moment he saw the figure take shape on the horizon.  His heart leaps in his chest.  He moves to the railing, shades his eyes with his hand. Excitement courses through his veins.  He strains to focus better, to see so far away.  Then he recognizes the gait of the traveler and surges forward.

 And he runs to him. It is an uninhibited sprint of a father’s joy.  It is the unstoppable, overflowing excitement in a father seeing the answer to his prayers, hopes and dreams materialize right before his eyes.  It is the non-judgmental eye of love that doesn’t see the dirt, the unrestrained joy that doesn’t smell the stench.  It is clear he didn’t see the dirt or smell the stench because, as fantastic as the running was, the next part is even better. 

            He threw his arms around him in the biggest of bear hugs, held on tight, and kissed him.

            Imagine the son’s surprise.  All he can think about are his mistakes, his filth, his unworthiness, his shame.  He tentatively hugs back.  When finally his father steps back to look at him, the son launches into his abject apology, his diatribe on his unworthiness, and his desire to become a servant to his father.  In one grand gesture, the father swept away the dirt, the guilt, the shame, the humiliation.  He reinstated the son to his place as the father’s child. He threw a party. Love, forgiveness, mercy, and grace.

            And there it is the most beautiful story of fatherly love, the most perfect picture of God’s feelings toward us, first told by the most reputable story teller— His son, Jesus.  Who better to know the heart of God than His Son?  Can you see it now?  Can you see yourself unkempt, filthy, ugly, haggard, shuffling along in search of the loving God your heart says has to exist?  Can you feel his arms enfold you, his radiant smile fall on your face, the brush of his lips as he welcomes you? I can.  Sometimes, I can almost physically feel him brush my hair back. Maybe I’m crazy—probably not.  I believe in this loving Father because I know him.  You can too.  The Bible promises if you seek him with your whole heart, you will find him. (Jeremiah 29:13)

            So this Father’s Day, seek out the Father, not because you haven’t been introduced.  You likely have been.  Seek him because you believe his love for you is active.  Seek him because he loves you, pities you, delights in you, laughs with you, and weeps over you.  Seek him because he is ever ready to come to your aid.  Seek him because he loves you because of, not in spite of, whom and what you are, and has spent your entire life waiting for you to see him as the loving Father he is.  May you seek him.  May you find him.  May your heart accept his love.  May your life be changed because you believe that you are beloved of the Father.

Be blessed.

The Proverbial Woman

I seem to make friends at the grocery store, usually in the age 70-90 range.  Often they are drawn in by the blue-eyed sprite in my grocery cart, but sometimes it is because I stop to help them reach something or prevent a refrigerator door from eating them as they get their milk.  I realized one day that I love them, those people that the rest of the world seems to have forgotten.  Then I realized something else—I inherited that cherishing of experienced humanity from my mother. 

Society has a horrible way of judging people loveable based on their age, looks, and abilities.  The elderly or challenged need not apply. It’s despicable.  It’s also ignorant.  Wisdom really does come with age, and I’ve met challenged individuals with better dispositions and more freely extended love than many of the alleged perfect folks.  Society is missing out, but not my mother.  I’m pretty sure she hasn’t met an older person she doesn’t love.  I’ve seen her show patience, kindness, and care to the challenged all my life.  When I found myself being like my mother in this most wonderful way, I stopped short and asked myself, “Thirty years from now, what trait will my children exhibit and realize they learned it from me?”

What a sobering thought. What a terrifying one.  I am not a perfect parent.  Some days I wonder how I made the cut. I feel like I’m running full speed through a dark maze sans guide or map.  I feel an enormous amount of fear that society will imprint my children’s minds more than I will.  I can’t let that happen. So I turned to the book of Proverbs for some advice.   What I found there was an interesting urging toward leading by example.  No passionate speeches, only powerful living.

In Proverbs 31, after posing the question, “Who can find a virtuous woman?” the attributes of said woman are outlined as such:

v  Her husband finds her trustworthy and she treats him well (v. 11-12).  This is not to be taken lightly.  Your relationship with your spouse is integral to creating a stable family environment. I’ve seen some women treat their husbands despicably and disrespectfully.  And the children take their cue from her—not just on how to treat a spouse, but on how to treat other individuals.  If you do it at home, your children will emulate it elsewhere.  Watch your step.

 

v  She works willingly, sacrificing even sleep so that her family can eat. Because of her industriousness, she does not worry when things don’t go as planned. She has already made provision for her family (v. 13-15, 21-22, 27).  Be industrious. Taking care of a family is serious business.  When I was 15 and thought I wanted 6 kids, I had no idea what that would entail!  Thank goodness I only had 3!!  Plan ahead.  You will save a lot of needless anxiety.  You don’t have to be a hoarder or stockpile a year’s worth of goods.  Just be a Boy Scout—be prepared.

 

v  She comprehends and practices intelligent money management and uses her investments wisely to increase her gains and provide for her family (v.16-19).  I’m not an investor.  I don’t have the head for it.  But I can stretch a dollar until it screams.  I think we all understand proper money management; we just don’t all practice it.  However, if you practice proper money management, you will find that performing the previous requirement of being prepared is a lot easier!

 

v  She helps the poor and needy (v. 20). James 1:27 tells us that one way to show pure religion is by visiting the fatherless and widows in their affliction. It doesn’t say to mail a check to charity.  It says to meet them where they are.  It says to get down in the trenches with them.  There’s no shortage of needy in our world.  Find your place to help and do it.  Remember that there, but for the grace of God, go you.

 

v  Because her character is without reproach, her husband receives greater respect among his peers (v. 23) I had to do a little research on this verse to make sure I was keeping in context.  It appears I was. The idea is that by doing her duties, being prosperous, trustworthy, respectful, and kind, the woman creates an even greater respectability for her husband among his peers.  Notice that it says nothing about her flawless beauty, delightful conversational skills, or charming wit.  True respect is gained by true character. 

 

v    Finally, she speaks in wisdom and kindness (v. 26). It’s so easy to just talk and let the chips fall where they may.  Guarding your tongue is much more difficult than it sounds.  Failure to do so can result in a tarnished reputation, damaged relationships, and even isolation. James 3:6 tells us that the tongue can defile the whole body, and James 1:19 instructs us to be quick to listen but slow to speak. So measure your words and allow wisdom and kindness to guide them. 

So there you have it--a guide to being the Proverbial virtuous woman.  Contrary to society’s opinion, this woman who builds the next generation is not necessarily beautiful, wealthy, or influential.  No, she is family oriented; using all of her efforts to ensure her family is well cared for.  She is an example of true Christianity in kindness and conversation.  She understands the fear of the Lord and exhibits it by living a Godly life.  In return, the Lord blesses her family.  Her children learn how to conduct themselves in a proper manner, how to be productive, how to treat others. Her sons learn what to look for in a wife and her daughters learn what to be as a wife.  As they mature, they realize how blessed they are to have her influence in their lives.

Who knew our actions, not our words, are the most important part of raising children?  It’s not a bunch of endless chatter and harping that forms their ideals, it’s simply how we act and react.  What we do today imprints the minds of our children and determines the values, morals and ethics by which they will live their lives. Properly imprinting the minds of our children is as simple as embodying the Proverbial woman. 

But don’t let your guard down; it’s not easy being an old-fashioned woman in a new-fashioned age.  Some days I’m not sure I’m up to the challenge.  But I am diligently striving to be a Proverbial woman.  I am working to imprint my children with love, kindness, responsibility and morality.  I pray that 30 years from now they will find themselves loving the unlovable, speaking words of kindness to a frazzled soul, helping someone less fortunate, or simply keeping to the high road and they will look back, as I do now, and say, “I learned this from my mother.”

Praying the Lord’s Prayer

Have you ever wondered what prompted the disciples to ask, “Lord, teach us to pray”? (Luke 11:1 KJV) Were they too distracted watching Jesus work that they couldn’t focus on how to talk to the Father? Did they sense complacency in their spirits because Jesus was physically present? Realizing that he would not always be with them physically, did they sense a need to prepare for the time when he wouldn’t be there? Whatever the reason, I’m glad they asked.  I’m even more thrilled with the answer they received—the epic words we know as “The Lord’s Prayer” (Luke 11:2-4, Matthew 6:9-13) are a phenomenal framework for daily devotion.

Even if the disciples weren’t distracted or complacent, I sometimes am.  I’m human. I get busy and harried.  I pray on the run. However, a couple months ago, I felt challenged to pray a personalized version of this prayer every day for 30 days. It changed my life.  It strengthened my soul.  Those 30 days were up over a month ago, and I find myself still turning to that model.   Everything I need for every day is wrapped up in this prayer.  Every day I followed the outline.  Every day I prayed the prayer.  Every day my soul grew stronger. Though my words were different daily, the progression was the same.

My Father in Heaven, your name is safety. The writer of Proverbs said that the name of the Lord is a strong tower and place of safety for the righteous (18:10).  Thank you for the safety you provide to those who follow you.  I am in awe of your care for me.    

Because your kingdom is where your will is done, I ask that you would establish your kingdom in my life.  Help me to be open to your will that you may work through me to prosper your kingdom in this world.

Father, you know what this day holds.  Please give me the strength to get through this day.  You know those of my friends and family who are facing obstacles today.  Please give them strength and courage to make it through this day, too.  Help us to trust you with each part of our day.

Lord, help me to have a loving and forgiving spirit toward others.  Make love and forgiveness my first response.  Do not let me harbor ill will. Help me to remember that I have needed forgiveness too and to offer it freely.  Help me to love others as you love them and to forgive as I would want to be forgiven. 

Please help me not to be tempted to sin today.  However, if I am, please grant me the spiritual fortitude to withstand temptation and be victorious. Deliver me from evil.

For all that you do in my life, for every opportunity I have to forward your kingdom, for every strength of soul and spirit you offer me today, the honor, glory and praise will always be yours. Amen.

So this month, I’m passing along the challenge—30 days of praying your own version of The Lord’s Prayer.  It’s simple. Begin by praising God, acknowledging his magnificence and reminding yourself of his ability to care for you. Unrestrictedly offer yourself to his service.  Acknowledge your humanity and humbly accept his help for that day. Ask that he fill you with his spirit and that his attributes will flow through you, touching others.  Be sure to give Satan his morning kick in the teeth by asking God to make you triumphant against temptation.  At any point, when you think of someone who may be struggling with something addressed in this prayer, mention them too.  And always end by giving the praise for any accomplishments to God because without his grace you’d be lost.  

I encourage you to keep a prayer journal and read over your prayers from time to time.  I hope that praying this prayer makes you more cognizant of God’s help, more willing to rely on him, and more triumphant against the messengers Satan sends to buffet you. Ultimately, I pray that you will feel yourself encouraged, strengthened, and more in love with Jesus as you pray in the manner he told us to model.  I promise your life will never be the same.  Live blessed!

 

**This idea came to me while taking a Bible class years ago, so I share credit for this segment with the teacher--my incredible earthly father.  Thanks, Daddy, for teaching a wonderful concept that has stuck even after all these years.  Perhaps someday we’ll write a book together!!

The Cross Keeper

It springs out of nowhere, that gigantic white cross by the side of the road. It’s an enormous reminder of a bigger-than-life moment when the antidote for sin was made readily available.  It is a reminder of infinite love, inexhaustible mercy, undeserved pardon, and amazing grace.  Today, it reminds me to forgive.  My heart has been wounded.  My child’s tender emotions have been needlessly tangled.  My world feels unstable.  I am emotionally bruised and battered. Yet amid the frustration, terror, pain and angst that seem to take turns battering my heart, the picture of the cross reminds me to forgive. 

A little over a month ago I felt compelled to pray a personalized version of The Lord’s Prayer every day for 30 days.  Remember the part where it says, “…forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors”? (Matthew 6:12) Well, every day for a month I prayed that God would help me to have a loving, forgiving spirit toward others.  I didn’t know that God was preparing my heart to endure hardness as a good soldier.  I didn’t know that on February 14, God began preparing me for the deep waters of March 19.  I didn’t see it then, but now I see that God was preparing me to forgive.

You see, I can’t afford not to forgive.  I can’t let the fear turn into bitterness that hardens my soul.  I can’t allow the frustration to boil over into unkind words or actions that don’t emulate Jesus.  I can’t allow hate, anger, and pain to cloud my judgment and keep me from seeing my final destination. I can allow nothing to separate me from Jesus. My relationship with him is just too important to me. Failing to forgive is just too costly.

Most of us either have been or are currently in the throes of forgiving someone who wronged us.  For some of us, it feels like the road to recovery is insufferably long, the path to forgiveness too rough.  Jesus gets that.  He travelled a long, arduous road up to Golgotha, but he did it because his relationship with us was too important to him.  Failing to offer us forgiveness would have been too costly.  He died that we might know the joy of being forgiven and the peace that comes by forgiving others.  The cross is my reminder to forgive.

A short distance before the enormous cross by the side of the road is a driveway titled “Cross Keeper Lane”.  The title urges me to embody the messages of the cross—love and forgiveness.  For some time now the combination of the cross and the sign has challenged me to be a Cross Keeper.  It speaks to me of loving others unconditionally.  It tells me to offer unlimited forgiveness.  But it is not easy.  I struggle.  Not everyone is readily lovable.  I do not always readily forgive.  But I am learning and growing.  As I continue to pray for a loving, forgiving spirit, I realize that I am becoming a Cross Keeper.  

You know, you can’t afford not to forgive.  Eventually it sucks the life from you, hardens your heart, and makes you view the world with a jaundiced eye.  Jesus is calling you to be a Cross Keeper.  He is calling you to love the unlovable, and forgive the unforgivable.  Just as he made the arduous journey up Golgotha to provide you with the joy of forgiveness, he asks that you make the monumental effort to forgive others that you might know peace.  He loved you too much to fail to provide forgiveness for your sins, no matter what they were. Do you love him enough to love and forgive others no matter what?  Do you love Jesus enough to carry on the messages of the cross?  Are you a Cross Keeper?

Losing the Weights

We are obsessed with weight loss.  Seriously, how many products are now available to “melt the pounds away”? We seem to equate a slimmer us with a stronger self esteem, a brighter outlook on life and, all in all, a more promising future.  Do we ever take the time to consider the other weights in our lives?  The ones we can’t drop in the gym. Those invisible weights that secretly scar our self image, overshadow our outlook, fill us with fear, and spoil our spirituality.  Yeah—those weights.

 It doesn’t take much effort to find people that are weighted down. For many of us it is a quick look in the mirror.  Life often hands us lemons and those tart experiences have built up until we are carrying scores of emotional pounds named guilt, grief, bitterness, hurt, fear, and failure.  Our hearts all bear the scars of previous wounds. They hurt. They irritate. They deprive us of peace.  Ultimately, they keep us from the fantastically freeing adventure of a lifetime of enthusiastic abandonment to God.

The author of Hebrews knew about those weights.  In Hebrews 12:1 he writes, “…let us lay aside every weight, and…run with patience the race that is set before us” (KJV).  Oh, yeah, he knew about the weights.  Those sneaky things Satan throws up to us don’t immediately stop our forward momentum but they slow it a little at a time.  The guilt of a past indiscretion. The hurt of an endured misdeed. The shadow of a past failure.  One by one they come to mind.  One by one they pile on.  And, one by one, our steps slow.  Our race lane becomes crowded with weights to the point we can no longer run unless we throw them all to the side. 

And we must. It’s impossible to finish the race while carrying the weights.  We have to stop allowing the guilt of past failures—both our own and others—to entrench us in bitter grief and bury us in hurt and fear. The weights don’t make us stronger, more focused, or less likely to err.  No.  Instead, they hold us back.  They make us vulnerable, weaken our resolve, and create distance between us and Jesus. They must be thrown away. We must give them to God who has no problem throwing them in the dumpster. They belong there.  Though the incidents that forged those weights may have helped create the race before us (and some of its detours), they don’t get to come along for the ride. Your race lane has no cargo space.

So brace yourself and do what it takes to drop the weight.  Forgive-yourself and others.  Accept-both the errors of the past and the forgiveness of God.  Change-leave the weights behind, they don’t enhance your faith, they erode it.  Heal-realize that the scars don’t make you broken, they make you stronger. Don’t pick the weight back up again—ever. Carrying it does you no favors. Don’t let the past keep you from the freedom of your future with God.  Run your race with wild abandon. You are God’s child. Forgiven. Accepted. Healed. Changed. Unencumbered. Don’t let anyone ever tell you differently. Run freely.

Trial of Faith

Why don’t we have faith in the epic power of God?  We believe the concept, but not the principle.  We ask in prayer for things, sometimes huge things, but our faith is often stymied by our disbelief in the power of God.  I don’t think it is that we think He can’t do something so much as we are afraid he won’t.  So we have taken up a course of “wait and see” praying.  It’s like we are testing God to see if he will stand up to his reputation. 

The idea is ridiculous, but not less true because of its ridiculousness. However, if you are among those administering the test, let me save you some time.  I can tell you that God does live up to his reputation because I have been at the point where my faith, such as it was, was all I had. Human resources were exhausted. There was nothing but me, my faith, and my God. When faith in God was all I had, I found out it was all I needed. As a result, I have personally experienced the epic power of God.  

When my husband retired from the military and began searching for a job, I learned the biggest lessons in faith I had ever learned.  Mostly, I learned that the faith we claim when things are simple is exquisitely insufficient when times are tough.  It is one thing to sing, “Faith is the victory” and quite another to fight for enough strength to invest in keeping the faith and hoping for a victory.  But as the days passed and the interviews ended without an offer, the strength ebbed and courage waned.  My faith did the same. 

            I spent nearly five months of that year fighting soul wrenching battles.  The ups and downs of life were nearly unbearable.  There were monumental mountaintops where I would calmly state, “God is going to take care of us.”  And I knew with surety he would.  He had promised.  Inevitably, those mountaintops were separated by unimaginably deep, dark valleys.

There were devastating downhill slides when my mind was bombarded with terrifying scenarios of our future. Of course, I had specific ideas of how God could rectify each scenario.  The answer to this was the soft whisper of I Samuel 12:16, “Now stand back and see this great thing, which the Lord will do before your eyes.” Relax. Stop the frenzy. Just hang out and watch the amazing thing God is going to do.

On the heels of those slides I would traverse dark, treacherous valleys of panic that said God was laughing at me, refusing to do something about my desperate need. I lashed out at myself, disgusted that I was such a horrible, unlovable person that God would leave us like this. I had tried so hard to please him, to have faith. I wondered what I had done wrong for Him to ignore me and not immediately heal my pressing need. Ultimately, I would lash out at God. He could do something if he wanted to, but I saw no great lightning bolts, heard no thunderous voice, saw no miraculous answers.  It seemed he wasn’t answering, and if that was true, what did that say about his character?

Those valleys were undoubtedly the most difficult. It was there I realized the slight stature of my faith.  It was devastating. I realized I was trying to manipulate God into fixing my problem with the answer I thought was best.  There is no faith in that.  Faith is trusting that the one who knows me better than I know myself, who loves my family more than I do, who can see the future and what lies therein is going to take care of us.  The valley taught me that the author of Hebrews knew what he was talking about. Faith really is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of unseen things.

The answer to my question of God’s character was revealed in his response to my pulsating wails.  He understood me enough to know that my juvenile faith required gentle care and showed me the words of Deuteronomy 33:27, “The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms…”  And there my faith found a refuge from the hideous, taunting voices that echoed through those valleys.  God’s arms would always be there. He would always take care of us.  And we came out of the darkness of the valley –together. 

Chances are you are floundering in your own terrifying valley right now.  Or you have in the past.  You feel helpless.  Your endurance is gone.  You’ve been praying and watching for your miracle only to be stuck with episode after episode of unfortunate circumstances.  Your faith wanes, you are emotionally destitute and physically worn.  You want to throw your hands up in defeat, but something urges you not to be hasty.  Faith says the answer is still coming.

And it is.  It may take longer than we like.  Questions may be more prolific than answers. We may be more scared than we have ever been in our lives. But when things are spiraling out of control and it seems we could do a better job on our own, it takes an act of faith to sit back and simply trust that the God who rides the Heavens to help his people (Deut. 33:26)  has our best interest in mind . (Jeremiah 29:11)

In the end, faith pays off.  Steadfastness is rewarded.  Blessings do come. We end up stronger individuals because of the journey. Eventually, God led my family out into the place he wanted us to be.  The timing of every piece of the puzzle was too perfect to even imagine anyone but God orchestrated it.  I’m stronger for the trying of my faith. I look around and know that I am further down the road for keeping the faith than I would have been had I caved to the pressure of Satan. 

             You will be too. Don’t let the darkness of the valley fool you. Don’t let the taunting voices throw you off track.  Don’t let your faith nosedive because the answer wasn’t what you wanted or didn’t come as quickly as you hoped.  Hold on to your faith.  Trust God to move your mountain. Watch the epic power of God work on your behalf. When you feel that your mustard seed faith is all you have, you will find it is all you need.