The Runaway

Being a spiritual runaway is exhausting.  Trust me, I know.  The questions that don't have answers, the fears you don't want to face, and the persistent emptiness of life all add up to a lot of worthless scrambling that leaves you lonely and discontent.  The only cure is to come back to the Father's house.  I'm clueless why we balk about it. Why we are so reticent to exchange pressure for peace, fear for faith, loneliness for love? 

It was pretty rocky for me when I first came back, mostly because I was busy paying the price for the lousy choices I made out there on my own.  I was also busy working out my own salvation and trying to decide which God was real--the one standing around every corner waiting to bash me over the head if I misstepped or the one who loved me immeasurably because of what I was, not in spite of it.  I'd heard plenty about the first one, but not so much about the second.  Turns out, the first character isn't God at all.  So I learned that God IS love.

I'm still learning.  Every day is a new lesson in faith, love, grace, patience, and God's character.  I feel like the Apostle Paul when he said something to the effect of, "Not that I have attained or am already perfect...I press toward the mark for the prize..." Yep.  That's me.  Still working on it. Still learning. 

So that's the idea behind this blog, sharing what I learn along the way.  Although I did spend a couple years in Bible college, I am not a preacher, teacher or theologian.  I'm more along the lines of people like Jonah who ran from his calling, Sarah who laughed at God's ideas, and Peter who caved to the opinions of others and denied knowing Jesus. The good news is that Jonah, Sarah, Peter and I all finally figured out our errors and corrected them. 

I have no qualms with being God's prodigal daughter--it means I've tried the other stuff and know it's not for me but it makes me able to understand others who feel the need to try it. It means I know who I am, where I came from, where I'm going, and who my best travelling Companion is.  It also means that my black robe and gavel were placed in the dumpster out back, because that's not my job. 

That being said, my prayer for you is to be real, be blessed, be loved...and that you pay those things forward.

The Returned Runaway